Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
