where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
