im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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