I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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