he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
why is half of my head shaved?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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