Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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