New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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