dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize
