and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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