Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
North Korea, Best Korea!
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
