pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
