i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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