I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
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