So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
