Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
