I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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