Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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