I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
It's never too late to be topless.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
