we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
