your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They took my balls.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
