i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Randomize
