Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Randomize
