Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
