Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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