im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
