I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
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