no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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