did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize