his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Randomize
