How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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