Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
