So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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