i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
