At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
