know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
