You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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