I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
