I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
