White coat. Heels.
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
