Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
