Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
