If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
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