So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
