The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
