Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
