why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
