Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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