What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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