North Korea, Best Korea!
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
