How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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